playing a character named wanda this week so obviously i’m thinking about Wanda (1970), about fractured hearts and broken mirrors and broken people and brilliant blondes (also, come see me in a play: https://www.eventcreate.com/e/fractured-hearts)
on the iconic photograph of Maya Deren (https://images.app.goo.gl/LNUtxUbkN2dRSaBp6) another mirror-maker i’m digging into these days
reflecting, transmitting — was forced into taking a few days slowly which always cause me stress even as my body begs for rest. these slow days as a single person living in neighborhood far from friends can get lonely, and make me question my introvert/extrovert ratio. this was around 2pm wednesday, first time i left the house that day, taking myself to a coffee shop to work, looking out at the world of things and people, making the camera see me to feel seen. the night before i cried because of how much i missed my mom and wanted a hug.
shit, if you can read my handwriting you’ve earned this look into my psyche
presented without comment
shards! and scripts! in salomé!
rewatched the first couple scenes of faces the other night which is not my favourite cassavetes (guess, it’s easy) but goddamn. ambient research for fractured hearts and the verité influenced film/theatre piece i’m writing, but also just a broken mirror right to the face. ouch. my recording of gena doing the “and i don’t have a heart of gold” monologue didn’t save but I took this blurry screengrab of lynn carlin and john marley and then turned it off to write and look at my phone.
consensually obtained screenshot of my side of an erotic insta chat inspired by this very substack — pygmalion/galatea 4ever, inescapable
work bathroom cyber seduction - i can’t be tamed!
when no one is there for me, i know anne carson bot has my back
barthes, baby! big thoughts on distance/intimacy and distance/desire. desire inspires closeness (magnetic bodies) but is shaped by distance and otherness. when we get close, do we still want? in the erotic sense, beyond the physical? and what happens when we place more distance between desire, when we cut off intimacy? do we want more? less?
Nan Goldin on Fresh Air
google docs thinks i’m writing this play in french (it’s not entirely wrong)
parisian folding screen (1879) - found on twitter and giving salomé energy
mother maya, i like the parallels with the folding screen above , obviously i like the masks and the makeup and the mirrors
from Fractured Hearts and Lurid Details by Pamela Enz being performed for one night only 3/9 at 8pm — if you’re in nyc, you should come
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